حتی این روزها که همه به هم برچسب «تاکسیک» میزنند، تشخیص روابط سمی و ناسالم راحت نیست، چون وقتی در رابطه هستیم، علاقهای که به شریک زندگی خود داریم، چشممان را نسبت به سوءاستفاده و بیاحترامی کور میکند. باور کنید یا نه، روابط آزاردهنده معمولا شروع خوبی دارند: پر از هدیه، تپش قلب و احساس دوست داشتهشدن. بههمینخاطر فرد قربانی فکر میکند کنترل اوضاع را در دست دارد و اغلب نمیتواند سوءاستفاده را ببیند. بههمینخاطر تصمیم داریم در این مقاله درباره روابط سمی حرف بزنیم و بگوییم باید چگونه از یک رابطه سمی خارج شویم.
What is the definition of a toxic relationship?
Toxic relationship is a relationship in which one or both parties instead of supporting and growing, causes mental exhaustion, anxiety, Feeling guilty or undermining self-esteem is another. The disappointing part of this story is that many times, we don't realize the situation until we are deep in the mire of these relationships!
In toxic relationships, control, lies, humiliation, mistrust, or unhealthy dependence are rampant, and instead of feeling comfortable with each other, people are constantly involved in fear, doubt, or feelings of worthlessness. These relationships are not necessarily abusive, but their common feature is disrespect and lack of boundaries.
A toxic relationship can also form between couples, friends, colleagues, or family members. People with mental illnesses such as bipolar disorder and Depression They are more prone to toxic relationships, because they have negative emotions.
Why are some people attracted to a toxic relationship?
The wounded mind considers the familiar pain safer than being alone; therefore, despite suffering, these people are attracted to toxic relationships because unhealthy emotional patterns have been formed in their minds, they have destroyed their self-esteem and self-confidence They confuse controlling or cold behaviors with love, because they believe that love means suffering. Also, since they experienced fear, rejection and control in childhood, they reproduce the same pattern in adulthood.What are the warning signs to recognize a toxic relationship? Below, they introduce the relationship as a toxic one:- You are humiliated instead of encouraged and you always feel inadequate or sabotaged.
- Relationships are always full of tension, arguments and dissatisfaction It can't.
- The relationship is full of control, dominance and the desire to dictate.
- Emotional needs are ignored and one of the parties is always obeying.
Behavioral signs of a toxic relationship in the other party
Toxic behaviors physical, emotional, mental health and social relationships Identifying these behaviors in time is necessary to prevent depression, anxiety, and even physical disorders.
- Denying and questioning reality, such that the victim believes there is a problem and misremembers the events. This leads to confusion, self-doubt and loss of self-confidence
- Contempt: This behavior is a mechanism for controlling and maintaining the victim's value. The toxic person plants a sense of worthlessness in the depth of the victim's existence with derogatory comments Criticisms become flaws in the victim's mind!
- Blame: Puts all the blame on someone else and refuses to admit his mistakes. This behavior leads to a constant sense of guilt and the victim's sense of excessive responsibility for the relationship. Jealousy: Excessive or irrational jealousy that manifests in the form of a sense of ownership, baseless accusations, and restrictions on social interactions.
- Controlling: Complete control over the clothing, travel, decisions and even opinions of the victim, which deprives him of independence and freedom and gives him a sense of captivity and powerlessness. rotates.
Psychological signs in you
- Expending your emotions and effort in a relationship is many times more than It is your perception, so you feel empty and worthless.
- You always feel that your needs are not being met.
- You always feel insulted and disrespected.
- You clearly see your low self-esteem.
- You receive no support and you are always the target of attack and humiliation.
- Depression, anger and exhaustion. He doesn't let you go.
- You don't become the best version of yourself around the other person.
- You feel that you have to be careful around this person so that you don't become the target of his poison.
- You spend a lot of time and emotional energy encouraging him and you get nothing.
- God is always to blame.
Destructive effects of toxic relationship on mental and physical health
The most important harm of toxic relationships is perhaps that it destroys the self-esteem of the victim and disturbs his mental health. When the mind is always occupied with relationship issues, other relationships and social life automatically lose color, a person experiences social isolation and welcomes depression. Gradually, a person falls out of the routine of life and has no mood for personal hygiene, sports, recreation, and his favorite entertainment. Slowly, anxiety and stress disorders, sleep problems, cognitive decline and immune weakness appear, and heart health is compromised. In the long run, these factors work hand in hand and lead the victim to unhealthy coping behaviors such as addiction.
How to get out of a toxic relationship?
"What is the way to leave a toxic relationship?" This is the common question of all the victims of these relationships. The answer is not so simple. Emotional dependence, fear of loneliness, financial dependence or the hope of changing a life partner are all powerful anchors that keep a person in a traumatic situation. The toxic cycle destroys self-confidence and decision-making power, making the prospect of quitting seem daunting or even impossible. In this section, we present some solutions for leaving these relationships.
1. Accept Change
The first step in ending a toxic relationship is admitting that your relationship is harmful and that you deserve better. We know how difficult it is to accept your current situation when you are dealing with strong emotions. But you have to endure this difficulty to restore your well-being and happiness.
2. Ask for help
If you need help leaving a toxic relationship, speak up, reach out, and ask for help. Leaving these relationships is difficult and in some cases risky. In this way, talk to a trusted friend, family member or psychologist and ask for advice. Their support and guidance during this challenging time is reassuring. In Doctor Doctor health system, you can receive a psychology appointment at any hour of the day and night with the best consultants in the country.
3. Gather Support
If you are being abused in a toxic relationship and are concerned about your safety, consider gathering support and a contingency plan by saving money, finding a place to stay, and keeping an emergency contact list.
4. Gradually distance yourself
In some cases, especially in situations where the force of reason does not reach love, it is better to gradually reduce the relationship and gradually distance yourself from the toxic person. This less invasive approach gives you more time to adapt.
5. Talk face-to-face
If you are not in physical danger, sit down across from the other person and be honest about your decision to leave the relationship instead of blaming, negotiating or trying to convince the other person. Keep this conversation calculated and focus on your feelings and needs.
6. Cut off contact completely
If your safety or well-being is at risk and you are getting more and more annoyed, cut off the toxic contact completely and block the way to contact again. Now that there is nothing left, block the contact number, email and social media ID to avoid further damage.
7. Stand firm
After you have made the final decision, the toxic person will resort to emotional behavior, promises of change, threats, and any other trick to trick you into staying. So, write your reasons for leaving the relationship on paper and look at that paper every time your heart trembles.
8. Get help from an expert
An expert counselor and therapist knows the best ways to leave toxic relationships. Ask an expert for help to process emotions, strengthen self-esteem, create healthy relationship patterns and leave these relationships with the least possible damage.
9. Take care of yourself
Leaving a romantic relationship, however toxic, is painful and you will be devastated during the recovery period. Try to spend this period with fun and relaxing activities such as sports, entertainment, meditation and spending time with your loved ones, and prioritize comprehensive self-care. Taking care of your physical health, maintaining a balanced diet and getting enough sleep are also important. Self-care prepares you for the challenges ahead by strengthening your self-esteem.
Doctor Doctor's Last Word
Occasional disagreements or conflicts are normal in any relationship, but a persistent and repetitive pattern of emotional damage, disrespect, and psychological manipulation soon leads to The deterioration of the mental and emotional health of the victim becomes a toxic relationship. The sooner these unhealthy patterns are identified, the easier it is to break free and the more likely it is to repair the psychological damage. By recognizing the red lines in time, you have the opportunity to take care of your peace, the boundaries of intellectual independence, and your sense of self-worth before an emotional dependence is formed.
If you see the danger bells of a toxic relationship on the threshold of a new relationship, talk to a psychological counselor before making any decisions or making any progress in the relationship. DoctorDoctor's online consultants answer your questions and guide you in online consultation sessions, while preserving your privacy, in a secure environment.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is the difference between a toxic relationship and a normal problematic relationship?Toxic relationships are associated with emotional abuse, control, humiliation and destruction of self-esteem and They are rarely treated. While problematic relationships can usually be repaired by talking and modifying behavior.How long does it take to recover from a toxic relationship? Resources
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Tags: The content of this article is for your general information only and does not constitute medical prescription.
