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Courtship etiquette for the boy's family: how to act professionally?
مقاله تخصصی

Courtship etiquette for the boy's family: how to act professionally?

3 weeks ago
151 بازدید
Dr. Masoume Falahian

Dr. Masoume Falahian

Tehran

Psychologist and consultant

Groom with chest flower and bow tie

The courtship ceremony, especially in Iranian culture, is not just a simple meeting for conversation; This ceremony is the first act of the show in which two families are introduced to each other with all their culture, values ​​and personality. Social psychology tells us that first impressions play a deep and lasting role in shaping future judgments. For the boy's family, who enter this field as applicants and guests, how they act in this meeting can determine the direction of all future discussions.

Observing courtship etiquette for the boy's family does not mean pretending or performing an artificial role, but it shows respect, authenticity and seriousness to start a happy relationship. These rituals are a set of behavioral and verbal subtleties that convey the message to the girl's family: "We value you and your daughter." Understanding courtship etiquette for a boy's family is the golden key to creating an atmosphere of mutual respect and trust.

Proposal Etiquette for Bride's Family: Dos and Don'ts of Proposal Night

Courting customs for the boy's family, beyond tradition

ring and bouquet in groom's hand

Some may think that courtship rituals are outdated and unnecessary. But from the perspective of relationship psychology, each part of this process has a specific function. Courtship etiquette for a boy's family will help you to:

  • Manage initial stress: Having a clear framework will reduce confusion and anxiety for both families in the first session.
  • Show your respect and authenticity: The way you enter, give gifts and speak is a reflection of your family culture.
  • Manage the conversation professionally: Dating Etiquette for the Boy's Family teaches you how to conduct the conversation in a constructive and stress-free manner.

Smart Steps Before the Ceremony: Preparing the Boy's Family

Successful courtship begins before ringing the doorbell of the bride's house. An important part of courtship etiquette for the boy's family goes back to the initial arrangements.

1. Initial telephone coordination

A phone call is the first showcase of your family. Pay attention to these points:

  • Who calls? Traditionally, the groom's mother or one of the older women in the family calls.
  • What to say? The call should be completely respectful, friendly and clear in tone. The purpose of the call (allowing the two young people and their families to get to know each other) must be clearly stated.
  • Schedule: Never pressure the girl's family to set a time. Give them enough time to think and coordinate. This flexibility is part of the courtship etiquette for the boy's family.

2. Internal coordination of the family

ring and bouquet

Before leaving, coordinate with your son (son-in-law) and other family members. Who is going to do the keynote? What are your goals for this meeting? Inconsistency in the meeting is a sign of lack of seriousness.

3. Making the right gift: a symbol of goodwill

Entering the first meeting with empty hands is not accepted under any circumstances.

  • The best choice: A beautiful and elegant bouquet is the most fashionable and the best option.
  • Are sweets necessary? Flowers alone are enough, but a quality box of sweets can also complement it. Avoid buying expensive or personal gifts on the first meeting, as this may upset the host family. This balance is part of the courtship etiquette for the boy's family.

Proposal Night Checklist: Dos and Don'ts

The promised night has arrived. Below is a practical checklist of Proposal Etiquette for the Boy's Family to help you manage the evening:

area must Don'ts
Timekeeping Attend exactly at the scheduled time (or at most 5 minutes earlier). This is a sign of respect for the host's time. arriving late (which is considered disrespectful) or arriving too early (which annoys the host)
cover and appearance Completely formal clothing, well-groomed and suitable for the Majlis (suits for men and formal dresses for women) Using overly sporty, untidy clothes or coverings that don't match the traditional courtship atmosphere.
How to enter and sit down Let the host guide you to your seat. Sit with respect and poise. Spreading around the room, sitting in an inappropriate place (eg the larger family seat), or acting too intimate and comfortable.
Conversation management Let the elder of your family (usually the father) start the conversation after the initial introductions by the host. Jumping on other people's words, members talking at the same time or the groom starting talking before the elders.
The role of son (groom) maintaining composure, respecting elders and speaking at the right time (after being introduced by the father) with confidence and transparency absolute silence (a sign of lack of independence) or talkativeness and dominating the parliament (a sign of disrespect for elders)

The art of conversation: what to say and how to say it?

This step is the main part of courtship etiquette for the boy's family:

1. Starting a conversation: respectful and purposeful

After the initial reception and the usual compliments, the elder of the boy's family (usually the father) should start the conversation in a respectful tone.

  • Example: "Thank you for your warm welcome. As we said on the phone, we disturbed you for the good and to get permission to get to know our son [son's name] better with your dear daughter [daughter's name]."

2. Introducing the Boy: Focus on Character, Not Wealth

At this stage you should introduce your son:

  • Focus on: Education, career, positive moral qualities (such as responsibility, kindness), general plans for the future, and why you are interested in this relationship.
  • Avoid: Exaggerating your wealth, possessions, or over-praising yourself. Let your character and sobriety be your knowledge.

3. Asking questions: respectful and general

You also have the right to ask questions to get to know the girl's family, but these questions should be general and respectful. Avoid getting into financial details or personal matters in the first meeting.

After the ceremony: saying goodbye and making the next appointment

Bride and groom hands with rings

The first session should not be too long (usually 1 to 1.5 hours is enough).

  • Farewell: Take your leave at the appropriate time, thanking the host again.
  • Specify Next Date: Dating Etiquette for Boy's Family requires you to specify assignment. You can say, "Nice to meet you. If you allow us, we will contact you again in the next few days to present the results of our research and ask for your opinion." (if you have research) or "If you agree, let's arrange another date to get to know the girl and boy better."

The importance of premarital counseling

observing all courtship etiquette for the boy's family, is only the first step to successful dating. But these are the appearances of the matter. After creating a positive initial impression, it is time for deep psychological knowledge, checking personality fit and learning communication skills. At this point, seeking help from an unbiased expert can ensure the way forward. Deep understanding is achieved beyond the dating night conversations and through the specialized processes of pre-marriage counseling.

Conclusion: Take the first step firmly

rings next to white flowers

Proposal Etiquette for Son's Family is a road map that will help you present an image of authenticity, respect and tact in your family at this important and fateful event. These etiquettes do not guarantee a successful marriage, but they certainly open the door to constructive conversation and a positive start. Remember that this acquaintance is the beginning of a long journey; A journey where success requires a deeper understanding of personality, values and communication skills.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Which members of the boy's family should be present at the first courtship meeting?

observance courtship etiquette for the boy's family requires that the first assembly be formal and small in number. The presence of father, mother and the groom himself is necessary. Sometimes a grandfather or grandmother (as an elder and out of respect) or an older sibling are also present. Avoid bringing all family members or young children separately.

2. If the girl's family asked direct questions about financial issues, how should we react?

Dating Etiquette for the Boy's Family dictates that you be transparent, but there is no need to go into great detail in the first meeting. You can respectfully give general and honest answers (eg, about jobs and income ranges) and state that more detailed financial matters are a matter that should be discussed in detail by the adults after the initial understanding between the two young people.

3. If we hear a negative answer in the first meeting, what is the best approach?

Maintaining respect and composure is very important. If you are met with a negative answer, keep calm, thank them for their hospitality and respectfully leave the House. Any discussion, insistence or expression of discomfort is considered unprofessional behavior.

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